Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Bienvenidos a Miami... Pt. 2

So I went to Miami... and had a pretty good time, for the most part. It's an interesting place... lots of sexy women, sexy cars, boobies, but hot and humid as the devil's taint. I mean damn...
I would walk outside and it reminded me of those old sweatbox parties from college... my glasses would immediately fog up.

Anyway, I went down for a birthday celebration, and did some celebrating. My girl from way back turned 25 and the group (me and 3 girls... I know) was determined to do it big. After the drive from Orlando to Miami (where we heard "Bartender" and "Ay Bay Bay" like 20 times), we proceded to go out and do the damn thing.

We made our way to a 20 dollar all you can drink "club" (was definitely a bar with a living room)... and some other spot... and took full advantage... almost getting into a fight/shot
(partly cause the ladies I was with cursed and pushed this guy), by some dude who thought he was hard cause he was from Brooklyn and his wife. May be the most unattractive couple this side of Amy Winehouse and whoever she's with, but that's neither here nor there.

This was also the point where my girl cursed me out... and I let it slide. (It was her birthday and all) We left fairly early and on
our way back we ran into this guy: James Brown's son and Mike Tyson's cousin... or at least thats who he said he was.

On the way back, I learned that "I need to open the window" actually means, "I've actually already thrown up all over myself and don't need the window open."
So that was good times...

The next day was the beach... and I learned that apparently it was
also a nude beach... (That's actually a topless woman right there... about 7 feet away from me)

And then there was the woman with gigantic fake boobies... yea... and there were kids all over the place... I guess Europeans don't believe in discretion. Enjoy...

After leaving the beach, I got to hit up the M.I.A. skate shop, which is really all I wanted to do and got some new SB's...

We then attempted to go to Bed (Some big time club). After waiting in line for like 20 mins and sweating my balls off, (I looked like Shaka Zulu would look had someone put him in a button down and slacks... hot and sweaty like a mug sans spear), we didn't go in cause of some shadiness with the funds and the door. This was after the ladies were being "harassed" by a gentleman that had apparently been kicked out of a couple clubs that weekend.

We left the line, and walked down the strip... apparently in the wrong direction for about 15 mins... before we turned around and made our way to Wet Willie's (a Miami landmark) and had some 'Call-A-Cabs'.

All in all a great weekend.

This pretty much sums up Miami... sexy, sleek, and flashy. It was prolly rented... which would make it like the fake boobies and even more Miami... not quite the owner's.


Jubilance said...

I love love love your recap...

And I'm sorry about the curse out still love me?

Miss O. said...

u sleazebag!

let the topless go in peace!