Tuesday, December 25, 2007

My Favorite things pt. 2 (Sneaker Edition)

First and foremost, happy holidays to everyone.

So, some of my most favoritest things this year have come in the form of some fantastic footwear. I don't know what it is, but there is something about a fresh pair of shoes that just makes you feel all warm and tingly. [||]

I've been blessed to be able to have a couple dollars to get a few pairs this year, as well being hooked up by friends and family. So here are a couple pics of my most recent ones as well as some of my collection.

Just got these for X-Mas... thanks to brother. Good Looks sir.

My Voltron Pack Ventilators... Good looks to K with these.

And the bottom of my closet. This isn't even the whole collection. I may have to come up with a better system. Those would be my 'Good Clothes' (C)Little Brother on top.

Oh and for my DC peoples... gotta have a pair of Nike Boots.

Lastly, one of the most important things for anyone that cares about his or her shoes is keeping them crispy. Probably my best
shoe related purchase this year came in the form of the Jason Markk shoe cleaner. Not to get all technical, but it has all sorts of oils and whatnot that don't hurt your shoes... and it's amazing... I'd definitely recommend it to everyone.

Have a good holiday everyone, I'm off to enjoy the family...

Sunday, December 23, 2007

My Favorite Things pt. 1

I know that Oprah does a version of her favorite things every year, and though I usually can't stand anything Oprah related (I even take the Oprah Book Club stickers off my books), I decided to do my own ghetto fabulous version for the next couple of days or so.

I've been blessed this year again to be able to buy or receive things that I really love so I figured I'd share a couple of them with you... in part because I hope to squeeze a couple of blog posts out of this too

My first favorite thing is my Northface Decagon Jacket.

I wasn't a big fan of Northfaces in general, partly because the P.G. Country Lil Wayne Stans stay trying to jack people for them, but now I see why they love em. Besides the obvious hood appeal, these things are fantastic on a technical level. I've never really been impressed by an article of clothing so much, and I can tell that the Northface folks put a lot into their Jackets.

It's water/wind proof, has more pockets than things I own including a couple hidden ones for iPods and other various things you want to keep hidden, and if I ever decide that I want to lose any hood status
that I may have left and "hit the slopes", it would be perfect. Also note, that I def copped the "Anchorage Green" colorway so as to keep the Lil Wayne Stans away. (They love the Black ones with all the fancy straps and buckles that look very close to straight jacket parachutes or something... why do young Black men need a coat made for the alps with a built in canteen and GPS unit, when they have never left P.G. county? I'll never understand.)

My next favorite thing from this past year is my Lacoste x Christophe Pillet watch from Collete in Paris. Now before you go thinking that I'm a baller... I got a hookup with this. (My friends are my most favorite things) There really isn't too much to say about this watch. Those of you know that know me know how I roll with watches. (I've been wearing those Burger King Simpson and Rugrats watches for years) So this is a huge step up. There's something about the big face on this, that makes it really sexy, and the Nigerian in me also loves the green and white. This will prolly be the only Lacoste item I own... and I'm alright with that.

Alright, thats it for today... hopefully tomorrow I'll have a couple more things.

Saturday, December 08, 2007

Back Again...

So I know it's been a while, and my apologies... but there is nothing to take away any free time you've had than the beginning of basketball season... and I've started reading again... books, actually. (BTW... if you're looking for some good reads, check out Cormac McCarthy's No Country for Old Men and The Road)

Anyway... what brings me back to my few readers is the concert I attended last weekend. Little Brother came to DC and brought a hell of a show with them. Reef the Lost Cauze opened (I'd never heard of him, but he was sick... definitely look out for him) and Evidence also performed. (He too did his thing) But Little Brother was definitely the highlight. Oh yea, and they brought the man Darien Brockington with them.

There's nothing quite like going to a live hip-hop show in a small venue. First off you get a great mix of folks, and there is always so much energy. The artists are feeding off the fans and the fans are feeding off the artists.

The other thing I loved about the show, was just how real these dudes were. Like you could tell they were hustling just as much as everyone in the crowd was. After the show, they were all selling their own stuff and were around to just chill out and talk to. I chatted it up briefly with Darien Brockington and Reef (he and his peoples tried to get at me for going to Penn... until I said I was a teacher...then they felt bad for me) But it was good times all around.

Highlights of the show... Reef's spoken word, Evidence wearing a shirt that said 'I Love DC' and showing his legal marijuana card, Little Brother taking us to church, crazy white girls, and the dude behind me that knew every word and proceeded to comment on everything Phonte said. (Phonte is a hell of a showman by the way)

Anyway, here are a couple pics... sorry for the quality... but I can't afford a good camera... I am a teacher after all

Phonte and D. Brock

Big Pooh getting Sexy [||]

Showing some love after the show

Anyway... make sure to show real hip-hop some love...it always makes for good times.

Monday, October 29, 2007

Is there anything better...

Than the delicious and fantasticly hood chicken wings and french fries... especially when you add some Mumbo sauce? For those that don't know, mumbo sauce is usually the sweet union between some combination of ketchup, hot sauce, bbq sauce, and whatever they throw in there at the carry-out. The thicker the better.[||] If you come to DC and go to a carry out and they don't have mumbo sauce... leave immediately.

Oh yea and please be sure to add a Rock Creek soda of a flavor that doesn't exist anywhere outside of the carry-out... Lime, Cherry, Peach, etc.

This just one of the few things that make DC the great city it is.

Oh yea... go buy the new Little Brother... 'GetBack' folks and support some good music.

That is all.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Youtube Killed The Hip-Hop Star

I read something a little while ago where someone wondered if Hip-Hop would go the way of Disco and other 'fringe' music. I thought about it and the first thing that came to mind was that it would be fantastic if this happened.

Why do I say this? Besides the hilarity that would ensue from rappers in disco-like outfits a la John Travolta, singing and dancing to tightly choreographed routines, while on roller skates... I've always wondered how many rappers would still be in the game if the possibility to make a lot of money really quickly disappeared. How many of these guys do it because they genuinely love the music? (And why does this only seem to be a question with Hip-Hop? I very rarely hear this with other types of music... or maybe I'm just oblivious) There are tons of 'successful' dudes out right now that say all the time that they aren't rappers, but rather hustlers. If these guys are hustlers, what does that make us as the consumer?

Jay-Z actually said it well in a recent interview:
“When a guy says – and this is definitely no disrespect, because everybody has their place – but when a guy says, ‘I can make a mil saying nothing on a track,’ you know you have reached a bad place. Not only did you think about it, you said it. So, [Hip-Hop] is way past salvaging. So, I’m just gonna do what I do.”
This is not to hate on anyone's hustle, if you can get people to believe in what you're selling... more power to you. However, don't get upset when someone who considers your hustle an art, calls you out. Because to them... this is the only way they can truly communicate with the world. And to bastardize that, can be seen as a great sin. I've always wondered why certain rappers got so upset when people challenge their music. I mean, if you don't really care about it, whats the big deal as long as folks are still buying?

And when the bubble bursts, as it appears to be close to doing now, what happens to all the hustlers? All the kids that came up because of a YouTube song and dance... where do they go? Hip-Hop and music in general is being saturated with watered down gimmicks and flash in the pan artists and eventually people are going to get tired of it. I mean they have to... right? (I would like to blame Viacom and Vivendi and maybe even YouTube for that)

It will be interesting to see what will happen to Hip-Hop when the bubble bursts and the labels give up on it. When all the people that really have no true interest in it, or passion for it, find
something else, that will be huge. Who is going to still be around and who is going to be on the next big thing? How many people are still going to care... or will it become something only done in those weird clubs by those odd people that get all decked out in their retro clothing while everyone just stares? Sorta like those people that get all dressed up for The Rocky Horror Picture Show? (Are those the hip-hop fans of the future?)

Or is Hip-Hop way too much of a cash cow for any of this to even happen?

Anyway... just my random thoughts...

As an aside: I just got an image of Soulja Boy doing his dance in a sort of Saturday Night Fever, disco-esque get up...
I think I would pay to see that. (Does that make me part of the problem?)

Crank dat Disco Stu....

Monday, September 24, 2007

Do I really want to smell like that?

So in my internets journeys, I stumble across some odd things. Some of which are so odd, that they inspire pseudo-intellectual rantings that all of my 20 or so readers are privy to. This particular item might take the cake. (I was gonna talk about this ignorance, but I refrained)

Apparently, the makers of Vulva Original(there is some nudity, so be warned) have figured out a way to bottle "the odor of a beautiful women." And from the name, you can probably guess what that odor is.

Now this isn't a perfume, or a cologne, and according to the site is:
A vaginal scent which is purely a substance for your own sensual pleasure.
What does that mean you might ask? Well I was wondering that too. Well, when you consider that according to the directions, one is supposed to apply this to the back of their hand and sniff... One might be led to believe that this meant to be used for umm... taking matters into one's own hands.

Is there really a market for this sort of thing? It's almost too ridiculous to believe, and yet there it is... staring me in the face, like a sideways smile. I'm at a loss. And where did they get this scent from? I'm really curious as to whom they based it on. Or maybe it's a combination of a bunch of women. Is that better? And is this a scent that can be crafted in a lab? Or is it like banana flavored candy, that they can never get quite right?

I'm just scared that it won't wash all the way off, like when you go the club and you get that marker on the hand, and it's still there like 2 days later and you have to explain what it is... but this would be a little more awkward...

Oh yea... and to cap this all off... their website is: smellmeand.com... they even have shirts that say that...

Let that marinate on your hands a little...

Sunday, September 16, 2007

Men are the New Women?

It seems like a stupid/meaningless question... but in regards to hip-hop, I think it's very relevant. SO what brings up this question you might ask? Well the latest in a long list of things is the song "Duffle Bag Boy". (I'm sure you've heard it, but if not... here.)

So when did it become gangster to carry a man purse? Not to say that I'm the most gangster guy out there, but I like to think that I've got some experience in at least recognizing it when I see it. And I'm sorry, I don't care how much money you have or what brand of bag you have... but a purse is a purse. Now I understand hip-hop's infatuation with brand names, and showing you can afford a Louis Vuitton bag is cool and all... but at the end of the day, it's still a purse.

Now maybe this a good thing, this blurring of the gender lines. Maybe it's showing that hip-hop is getting in touch with it's "feminine" side. Or maybe the latent homo-eroticism that's in a lot of hip-hop is finally starting to be exposed? Or maybe I'm just reading too much into a trend and need to go get my duffle bag on?

I dont know... but I do know that when I was growing up, if a dude walked into my neighborhood with a man purse on... he wouldn't be considered cool to say the least.

Lastly and on a somewhat unrelated note... check out this group Blu & Exile. They just put out a cd titled 'Below the Heavens'. This is quality hip-hop... one of the best cds I've picked up this year.

And they don't wear man purses.

Check the video:

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

America Has Gone Dumb...

Finally... something blog worthy...

So, I'm sure that many of you have seen the now famous clip of Ms. South Carolina in the Miss Teen USA pageant. And I'm also sure that many of you have come to the conclusion she must be quite dumb. However, if you are to believe the Today Show in the following clip, then you would be mistaken.

Now come on people... who are we kidding here? This young lady completely butchered a fairly easy question and the English language. The question was about people not being about to spot out America on a map... and she ended up talking about South Africa and Iraq! How does that happen? I don't care how "nervous" she and Ann Curry claimed she was. She couldn't even construct a sentence... I had to watch her answer like 3 or 4 times before I could even piece together some of the answer.

Now besides the fact that she couldn't put together a coherent thought in that pseudo answer, I'm mad that she got to go on TV and "defend" her idiocy. How does that happen? Not to pull the race card, but there is no way that a Black person gets that luxury. But because it's a cute white girl, they give her another chance. And she does ok with the second chance, but she did have almost a week to do so. Not that I would have bashed her when she came on the show, but I don't think that being buddy with her as Curry was, was the right call either.

I don't know... maybe it's the educator in me, but I don't like to reward stupidity and I feel like that is exactly what is going to happen.

Anyway...as the principal in Billy Madison says
what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.

But... like, such as...maps... south africa and iraq and asian countries... and such.

Please learn your kids people. Oh yea... and she came in third... now that's a prestigious competition.

video: Ms. South Carolina Today Show interview

Friday, August 03, 2007

Top 10 Hottest MCs in the Game?

MTV, being the bastion of all that is hip-hop has come up with their list of the hottest MCs in the game. And me being the verbose, psuedo expert of hip-hop that I am... felt the need to comment, rip apart, and trash their selections.

Here's the list:

10. Jim Jones
9. Common
8. 50 Cent
7. Jay-Z
6. Young Jeezy
5. Kanye West
4. Andre 3000
3. Game
2. T.I.
1. Lil Wayne

So first off... our boy Jim Jones is on this list? I can't even fathom what sort of logic went into that decision. Apparently they didn't get the memo that one "hot" song does not make you an MC. (See MIMS) But honestly, do people really think this guy can rap? I don't even think he's as good as fruity-tooty rapper Cam'ron, who is not even as good as Juelz.

I won't say that Jimmy isn't entertaining, but I will say that he is not a top ten MC. I know there isn't much to choose from, but he is definitely taking a spot from more talented/qualified MCs.

As much as I don't want 50 to be on the list... given the current state of music, I guess he can stay, but only based on past achievements. His music right now is... "eh" at best. And to be honest, I'm convinced that he made a bet with Yayo or something and told them he could go platinum with any garbage that he puts out. Yall hear the song with Justin? 'Ayo Technology'? Who does that? What does that even mean? I'm confused.

I'm also confused by Jeezy being on this list. I mean I guess his first album did so well that he decided to make it twice. I mean what has he really done this past year? The White girl song was kinda funny... but I really can't remember anything else of consequence from him. And how is Jeezy better than Jay? That just doesn't even seem right. We get it... you can come up with a bunch of different words for cocaine... jeez. And if we're going for a guy with an interesting little squeal/ad-lib... why not Jadakiss?

The order of the rest of the list needs some re-arranging. Now I actually like T.I. but there is no way that anyone can convince me that he should be number two. "Big Things Poppin"? I'm gonna need him to do better. I actually really like T.I. too... but to put him above Andre 3000 is criminal. Even Kanye is doing better than T.I. right now. Although I've found that Kanye's remixes of songs are usually more entertaining than his own songs. (See the 'Throw some D's remix')

Why is the Game on this list? His album was alright... but what has he done this year? I honestly can't think of anything significant besides getting arrested for pulling a gun on someone during a basketball game and name dropping Dr. Dre and Detox.

As much as I like Lil Wayne, I'm not sure I can put anyone above Andre. He's absolutely killing things right now... he has taken over every song he's been on and made it his. I would def have to put him at one. I'd keep Wayne in the top three partly because of the sheer volume of his work. He apparently records 6-8 songs a night... that's insane.

As far as folks not on the list... I'd like to see Kweli (Eardrum will come out soon... I promise). Eaybe Nas? (Hip-Hop is Dead was serious) What about Ghostface? I don't know what he says half the time... but he says it so well. And he's basically the only one from Wu-Tang doing big things.

There are some young guys that I'm really feelin now too... especially the cat Skyzoo... and maybe even Saigon(his album will come out too... I promise)

Anyway... all this to say... MTV doesn't know crap about hip-hop and I do. That is all.

Thursday, July 26, 2007

How to be a Black hipster or just a hipster in general...

You too can be cooler than all of your friends... just follow my handy dandy guide to 'hipsterdom'.

The New York Times came up with the word 'blipster', which is what they called a Black hipster, and apparently they're on the rise. And even though this might be a little late, I still think it could be of some help to you guys.

So without further ado...

1. One of the most important parts of being a hipster is the hair. Your hair is one of the first things people notice about you, so to be a Black hipster, you've gotta do something different with yours. The mohawk is one way to go, but its a little played now as even Diddy had one. Some other ways to go would be dyeing it a random color (especially good for girls) shaving various parts and leaving other parts unshaved or anything asymmetrical (also good for girls). Mixing various styles (like Kele from Bloc Party above)is good too. This all shows that you don't really care what others think, and that you're above the norm, which is really important in being a hipster.

2. Clothing is another big aspect of being a hipster. One of the defining characteristics of being hip is skinny jeans. The skinnier and tighter the better. I would recommend the Levis shrink-to-fit raw denim jeans as you can tailor those to your needs. The best way to go about getting your jeans skinny would be to sit in a tub of hot water with them on... then you can ensure that you'll never be able to have kids again. (If your closest girl friend can fit in them easily, then they aren't tight enough... so try again.)

You will also need to find things from your childhood fads that didn't make it, i.e. Starter caps, flannel, etc. Basically anything you can play off as being ironic is key. And don't forget those accessories. You'll need some black rimmed glasses a la Malcolm X or Drew Carey,
and for girls, mismatched earrings are a must. Even a big chain or a multi fingered ring. One of those head covers that you usually only see Arabs wearing in the desert is also a plus, except wear it like you're a bandit. That's big.

What about your feet you ask? Well I've got you covered there too.
I would recommend some Vans or Chucks. But you can't wear them all fresh and clean... throw them around in the dirt a little or buy the ones that look really used, but are really expensive.

The most important thing with clothing is that whatever you do... Don't MATCH! I cannot stress this enough. You will be mocked and scoffed if you do.

3. Music is another way to define yourself as a hipster. Basically all you wanna do is listen to any 'alternative' or 'underground' rock and/or rap that you can find. Preferably anything your non hipster friends don't know. And the more 'emo' it is, the better. (If you don't know what emo is, just look for the guys with the asymmetrical hair cuts and black eye liner.) Also, liking the Ramones (or acting like you do) is a huge plus.

4. This step is not quite necessary, but if you want the image to be complete I would recommend it. Buy a skateboard. You don't have to know how to skate (it would help however), but you've got to look like you could. (If your jeans are tight enough, it will probably be hard to skate well anyway.) This shows that you're in touch with your alternative side and that you're a rebel and different... so what if every 13 year old skates now.

5. Lastly, and this is probably the most important step. You must develop an attitude that shows that you don't care about much, and that you're too cool to be bothered with anything that isn't about being cool or different. But you have to do this while acting like you aren't doing it. (Often looking into the distance is a good way to do it) Sorta Like these guys:

Well thats basically it, I hope that this helped and I wish you all the best of luck in your future hip endeavors.

And because I'm so hip... I don't actually care if you liked this or not.

(Australia recap and stories coming soon)

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Bienvenidos a Miami... Pt. 2

So I went to Miami... and had a pretty good time, for the most part. It's an interesting place... lots of sexy women, sexy cars, boobies, but hot and humid as the devil's taint. I mean damn...
I would walk outside and it reminded me of those old sweatbox parties from college... my glasses would immediately fog up.

Anyway, I went down for a birthday celebration, and did some celebrating. My girl from way back turned 25 and the group (me and 3 girls... I know) was determined to do it big. After the drive from Orlando to Miami (where we heard "Bartender" and "Ay Bay Bay" like 20 times), we proceded to go out and do the damn thing.

We made our way to a 20 dollar all you can drink "club" (was definitely a bar with a living room)... and some other spot... and took full advantage... almost getting into a fight/shot
(partly cause the ladies I was with cursed and pushed this guy), by some dude who thought he was hard cause he was from Brooklyn and his wife. May be the most unattractive couple this side of Amy Winehouse and whoever she's with, but that's neither here nor there.

This was also the point where my girl cursed me out... and I let it slide. (It was her birthday and all) We left fairly early and on
our way back we ran into this guy: James Brown's son and Mike Tyson's cousin... or at least thats who he said he was.

On the way back, I learned that "I need to open the window" actually means, "I've actually already thrown up all over myself and don't need the window open."
So that was good times...

The next day was the beach... and I learned that apparently it was
also a nude beach... (That's actually a topless woman right there... about 7 feet away from me)

And then there was the woman with gigantic fake boobies... yea... and there were kids all over the place... I guess Europeans don't believe in discretion. Enjoy...

After leaving the beach, I got to hit up the M.I.A. skate shop, which is really all I wanted to do and got some new SB's...

We then attempted to go to Bed (Some big time club). After waiting in line for like 20 mins and sweating my balls off, (I looked like Shaka Zulu would look had someone put him in a button down and slacks... hot and sweaty like a mug sans spear), we didn't go in cause of some shadiness with the funds and the door. This was after the ladies were being "harassed" by a gentleman that had apparently been kicked out of a couple clubs that weekend.

We left the line, and walked down the strip... apparently in the wrong direction for about 15 mins... before we turned around and made our way to Wet Willie's (a Miami landmark) and had some 'Call-A-Cabs'.

All in all a great weekend.

This pretty much sums up Miami... sexy, sleek, and flashy. It was prolly rented... which would make it like the fake boobies and even more Miami... not quite the owner's.

Monday, July 09, 2007

Bienvenidos a Miami... Pt. 1

In honor of my recent trip to Miami... I decided to do a quick PSA regarding Florida's finest R&B superstar... T-Pain.

Just in case anyone still had any questions as to whether or not the boy can sing... I provide you with the following video. Enjoy.

This is not to say that I don't secretly enjoy the boy Theodore Pain, and even though I heard 'Bartender' like 30 times in the couple of days that I was in Miami... We definitely wilded out every time it came on. But he can't sing worth a damn.... and he knows it. Its great.

Anyway... the full Miami recap with pics of fake boobies is soon to come.

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

As a diehard Bullets fan...

I would be remiss if I didn't post a little something about our first round draft pick, Nick Young. Besides being ridiculously athletic, (check out the dunk below), he seems like a pretty decent kid.

Apparently his older brother was killed in a drive by, by a 14 year old when Nick was 5 and has just gone through a bunch of stuff which sadly has become typical for many young Black males today. But throughout everything he has gone through, he seems to have done alright for himself and his family. (They nicknamed him the "chosen one", so he had a lot to live up to)

There is a documentary that was made about his struggles/eventual success, and the Washington Post did a nice little piece about it... check it out.(
I'm hoping it'll come out around here soon.)

And now the dunk... I get goosebumps thinking about him and Gil on the court at the same time...

He's already said that he can't wait to catch oops from Gil and that he'll be in the dunk contest.

I'm excited.

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Foxy vs. Paris...

Who's more gangster?

On first glance one would think that this question would be very easily answered. I mean Foxy has to be more "gangster" right? I mean she's from Brooklyn, beats up manicurists and raps about all sorts of gangster stuff. And Paris is heiress to the Hilton Hotel fortune and doesn't quite exude gangsterdom.

When you look deeper into this however, recent events might change just who you think is more gangster.

In case you haven't heard, your girl Foxy got stomped out by a couple girls after getting dragged out of a car. Apparently, upon learning that her boyfriend was a pimp (how do you think she figured this out? you think he tried to put her on the stroll?), she broke up with him. He then called up some of his girls and they went to work on Foxy.

Now this is obviously not a good situation. However, what happened next makes me question Foxy's gangster. After getting her weave snatched out and her hearing aid taken, she filed a police report and went around with the cops to point out the chicks that did it. What? Is that gangster? All that tough talk on songs and then this?
I protect you like a vest do
I'm the lady with a 380 special right next to you
Glock poppin' out the stock
And it's two guns, two hun', get down
I tear this whole shit down
They ain't know the vault, pull bank jobs
I banged ya squaw when I aims this rod
Y'all niggas can't do a thing to this broad
My bullets hurt the same as y'alls
I've been taught by the best, extorted the rest
Wearin' a niggas shit, crossin' my chest
Life on the line, say prayers under my breath
But knew I'd be 'aight cuz right there to my left
("Bonnie and Clyde, Pt. 2")

I guess the 5'2, 125lb. girl that was beating her up didn't hear this song... womp.

I feel defrauded. I think I want my money back for buying 'Chyna Doll', beside the fact that it sucked, and Jay was writing tracks for her for a minute, if she doesn't "pop glocks"... then she's just been lying to me... hopefully no other rappers have done that.

Because that would hurt...

Oh yea... so after all is said and done, and the police reports are filed... she said it didn't happen... huh?

On the other hand, we have Paris. She just served her time in the pen, and I heard she was getting a tear drop tattoo like Weezy. Apparently, my sources tell me that she had the jail on lock.

("We run tings... Tings no run we!")

There's no snitching for Paris and besides that, she does all sorts of drugs, alcohol, has sex with everyone, drinks and drives, and only managed to serve 3 weeks in jail. And she does all of this with the paparazzi following her around and taking pictures of it all! If that's not gangster... I don't know what is. Thats seriously on some Scarface type mess...

I'm just sayin is all...

On a random note... If you "missed" the B.E.T. awards (good job by you), here's a pretty funny recap.

Monday, June 25, 2007

Just call this hip-hop thing a wrap...

To all of you that love hip-hop... just give it up. It's officially done. And I know I've said it before... but after seeing the following clip... the nail is in the coffin.

I present to you the Oregon State NCAA Champion baseball team... also known as the O State Ballaz (yes thats BALLAZ... don't forget the Z):

And in case you want more... here is the O State Ballaz website... with a full music video and everything.

There's nothing quite like a group of corny white folks rapping... I tell you what.

Friday, June 22, 2007

Little Brother - Good Clothes

The first single off the highly anticipated (by me at least) 'Getback'.

I'm bout to put my good clothes on and enjoy this weekend...

Btw... you all know you've wanted to tell someone you've seen with a little too much showing that she "Better go to Lane Bryant."

Some of yall need to step up your Little Brother game...

Thursday, June 21, 2007

A Bay Bay....

Alrighty... at some point enough is enough right? I don't want to be a music snob or anything, but is it me, or are rappers just getting dumber and dumber? (Some would call them trash)

What brings this on you might ask? Well I was randomly perusing one of the video networks and I happened to come across the MTV "Jam of the Week"... and interesting little diddy by the name of "A Bay Bay".

Now, some of my kids told my about this a couple months ago, and I could only stand to listen to about 10 seconds of it. If you've never heard it, it goes something like this:

"I walk into the club...A bay bay
something, something, something... A bay bay
blah, blah, blah... A bay baby.

As an English teacher, I automatically have problems with this, and as a lover of music, my problems increase many times over. I mean, can we provide basic grammar classes to these jokers? They don't have to speak the queens English, and I understand they're speaking colloquially and all, but can they at least spell the lyrics correctly?

That's really all I want... I won't even get into the repetitive simplicity of the song, or how all you need to be able to do is put random syllables together and combine them with your Casio keyboard these days to make a "hit". I just want people to be able to spell things correctly. Maybe then we could get kids to learn how to speak and read.

But maybe I should just be happy that he's trying to spell things phonetically... and hey, at least you can snap to it.

Now if you'll excuse me... I'll just be snapping my grinning ass to the local watering hole.

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Messing with the same girl...

There's nothing like a quality R. Kelly track to really get the summer popping... and when you throw in the almost movie-like quality of some of his videos, you know you're in for a treat...

Anyway, here's the video for the hilarious Kells and Ursher track "Same Girl"

Oh yea... there's a twist at the end

And thats definitely a real R. Kelly mannequin thats made in Japan for all of you that wanna be trapped in the closet with him...

Monday, June 18, 2007

Not a bad start...

To what could be a great summer...

So I went to the "beach" this past weekend... Dewey Beach in Delaware to be exact, and although I didn't really touch the beach at all, in principle I was there. (I didn't really miss anything, I could see the sand from the roof of our hotel.) If you've never heard of Dewey Beach, just picture lots of drunk white folks in their late 30s to mid 40s wearing offensively corny t-shirts. (For example: I do all my own money shots) Quite the spectacle indeed. When you accompany this with a little slap fighting, a game of Asshole, and a former NFL cheerleader... you're in for some quality times.

However I was a bit disappointed by the showing of the older folks I went with. I guess the married 30 somethings just can't hang like they used to... at the least the guys couldn't... The wives were definitely bout it... but thats another story. But the young folks held it down.

The highlight of the weekend and the inspiration for this blog and the accompanying picture would have to be one of the guys that I shared the room with. This guy failed to inform us that when he sleeps, he sometimes has a tendency to SCREAM.

I kid you not my friends... this dude definitely SCREAMED into his pillow on more than on occasion. Apparently I slept through the first time, and was quite hesitant to believe that this mild-mannered man could do that. And even when I heard it, I almost didn't believe it. It was like a bad horror movie. I half expected him to wake up and kill us. You haven't lived until you've heard a grown man half scream, half moan into his pillow whilst sleeping.

The funny thing about this all is that he actually told us after the first time that he forgot to mention that sometimes (read: after drinking) he might scream a little...

Anyway... it was good times... and I made it home to watch a fantastic episode of Entourage...

Lastly, I think I've discovered my new show for the summer... Flight of the Conchords. (You can watch the first episode here) These dudes are hysterical. They're a real band from New Zealand (sort of like a folksy Tenacious D), and they've moved to NY... definitely check it out... comes on after Entourage and is one of the funniest shows I've seen in a while. (They also have quite the following)

Check out this clip if you're not convinced...

"And when you're on the street... depending on the street, I bet you're definitely in the top 3... good looking girls on the street..."

Thursday, June 14, 2007

With Fans Like These....

And that smile of course, There is no way Obama should lose...
Although, this is probably the exact reason that White folks like this young ladies parents won't vote for him...

ah well... at least we can enjoy this and hope for more

Sunday, June 10, 2007

We The Best!

So, I've been away for awhile again... I know... but I was finishing up the school year... and its done. So i'm back... for now at least..

Anyway, so I downloaded a mixtape hosted by DJ Khaled... and I swear, he might be the most obnoxious, narcissistic, idiotic, pseudo-DJ ever. He constantly shouts out his catch phrase "We the best!" so much that it almost makes you wonder if he even actually believes it.
I said this to someone else the other day, and they asked if he was worse than DJ Clue used to be... I would have to say yes. (What's Clue up to these days? I guess saying your name repeatedly doesn't keep you famous)

All of this is to ask, what's the point? What do these guys do? I mean, if you're producing, ok, fine. I might be able to understand that you'd want people to know you're producing, so maybe you'd say your name a little... maybe. But most of the DJs that put out big label albums aren't producing. And if they aren't producing, why should we care? Am I supposed to get excited cause Khaled knows a bunch of rappers? I mean... that doesn't impress me too much. He's honestly just a glorified hype man.

One could then make a bigger point saying how music today is definitely more concerned with celebrity than anything else. And people will like whatever you tell them to. But that's not really saying anything that anyone doesn't know...

Take a listen and tell me it's not annoying:

We the best!

P.S. Does it bother anyone else that Khaled says the loathed "N-Word" so much? Not that it should be said that much to begin with by anyone... but last I checked, he's definitely not Black...

And now... as a treat... the song of the summer... The album is going to be worth getting just because of this song.

Thursday, May 10, 2007

It's Official...

50 cent is a master magician and has pulled some David Copperfield, Houdini, David Blaine type ish. He went from being "hard-core" and just destroying anyone in his path, to becoming the very thing that he got everyone to rally against... Jah Rule. Its actually quite similar to the movie Highlander. (I used to love Duncan MacLeod... "There can be only one!") He beheaded Jah and assumed his "powers". What powers you ask? The dis-ability to make any song sound extremely homo-erotic. This is actually quite a feat, and should be considered extremely remarkable. The only drawback is that he has ceased to be relevant in hip-hop entirely.

You might be wondering what sparks this... 50's new single
On it, 50 not only manages to sing/talk the hook about how various parts of his body are roller coaster rides (because they go fast for a short period of time?) and that sex with him is like an amusement park... or something like that (its hard for me to listen), but he even makes a reference to the gawd awful 'Magic Stick'. It almost sounds like 'Magic Stick Redux' in a couple parts. It's as if, while hanging out with Floyd Mayweather Jr. someone was like... "50 you really need to get back to your 'Magic Stick' roots... that's when you were nasty." Either that or I guess 50 really wants us to know about his sexual prowess.... (that's not a pretty image)

The funny thing is that I can't even imagine 50 at an amusement park. And if he were there I think he would frighten all the kids away, or the park would implode...
The carnival will never be the same again.

So to recap... 50 cent is the new and improved hip-hop Highlander. Hold on to your domes...

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Some Good Music....

I've been slacking again.. I know. I've been legitimately kind of busy though: developing a new class, grading, coaching, etc... but I'm trying.. anyway...

So everyone hates hip-hop now... and can you really blame them? After Cam'ron's idiotic rantings on 60 minutes, it's no wonder that people think our music is the worst thing since crack. (The funny thing is that people thought the same thing about jazz way back when..."Does Jazz Put the Sin in Syncopation?") Hip-hop hasn't been in the news like this since C. Delores Tucker was telling the world how bad "gangster rap" was for your soul.

Ultimately the real concern, as with Jazz way back when, is that hip-hop is now infecting all those young, impressionable middle class white kids, and that is a big no no. We can't have them learning all the ills of ghetto, or adopting it's beliefs (i.e. 'Stop Snitching').

All this being said, there is still some good in the music... (this not being it... besides the fact that Knowles family is a bunch of hustlers, anyone else mad at the kid named Juelz? I mean honestly, comeon... that's just wrong.)

So onto the good... I've been working on a list of the top 25 hip-hop albums of all time, which is extremely hard, but its coming. But for now, I wanted to put you on to some of the quality music that I've been enjoying:

W. Ellington Felton - Outrospective: Me Then, Me Now - A nice little mix of hip-hop, soul, funk, etc. And he represents DC... Definitely feeling this one. It's not new, but it's probably new to you.

Black Milk - Popular Demand - This cd is great. A protege of the late J. Dilla who is also from Detroit. He's a producer that can actually flow pretty well without being too backpackerish. This is definitely a nice mix of "mainstream" and underground.

Eric Roberson - Left - A real chill and soulful album. Another guy that reps DC, he's been hustling on the underground scene for a while. It's not as good as this cd (which I had been looking forever, and finally found), but its pretty damn good.

Gym Class Heroes - As Cruel as Schoolchildren - I know it's poppy and such, but you know what? It's actually pretty good. It's hard to classify, but I guess alternative hip-hop fits. They get compared to The Roots a lot, and they do play their own instruments, but that's where the similarities pretty much end. The lyrics are fairly humorous and the poetic interludes are great.

Brother Ali - The Undisputed Truth - A real deep, passionate, and very personal album. He definitely doesn't hold anything back and its refreshing to hear someone talk about things that hold true significance in their lives and that people can relate to.

Alrighty... hopefully I'll be back with my list soon... cause everyone loves a list.